Thank you for your kind messages of support. I’m sorry if I don’t respond right away to your blog comments, texts, voicemails, and emails. Please know that every word you write to me or say in a voicemail means the world to me. There’s nothing like the comfort of friends. I’m so very blessed by you. Thanks to some angel friends of mine for the dinner last night and for coordinating meals for the next few days. I’m humbled by your generosity.
Many of you have asked how I’m doing. I’m straddling two worlds right now. One world is filled with everything good and my mom is still alive. But then I remember she’s gone and I’m instantly in the other world where nothing is good. There’s very little space between. One moment I’m laughing with my dad and family as we tell our funny stories and eat the wonderful food my friends brought over. And then I remember my mom isn’t here with us and she’s never going to be with us again, and all of a sudden I’m grieving every moment I’ll never have with her. I watch my kids playing around with their uncle knowing they’ll be crying in my arms at any moment.The sadness rushes in so fast we can’t brace for it.
How does it feel to lose my mom? It’s like being held under water longer than I could possibly survive, but somehow I’m still living.
Please pray for more space in between worlds. God’s grace is sufficient. Although at times, it seems barely. Even though I can’t hear her voice or see her body, I do feel strangely closer to her.
Thank you for sharing your stories with me. Many of you have walked where I am right now, and your encouragement is just what I need. I know the suffering won’t kill me, but it feels like it will. To know that you’ve come through it helps me tremendously.
I’ll keep you posted about my mom’s memorial services. Thank you for asking. We’ll be helping my dad make all those decisions tomorrow.
I have so many blessings to tell you about. At some point I’ll share them with you.
Thank you again for all your support.
“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning
or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelation 21:4